How do you know when you're ready to start dating again? You don't want to hold yourself back, but you don't want to use someone as a rebound either.
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Obviously breakups and recovery time vary based on the relationship, which means there's no hard and fast rule for when to enter a new one. But if you're thinking about getting back in the dating pool, here are a few red flags that mean you might not be ready just yet.
Whether you use your ex as a golden standard or scrutinize potential beaus for their old annoying habits, this is a major sign that you still have a lot of baggage from your last relationship. Even though you might be angry—not wistful—if your ex is constantly on your mind, it means you're not over them.
It's unfair to the other person and to you to rush into something when you haven't let go of past feelings for a SO, even if those feelings aren't necessarily positive. But when you find out they're single aka availableyou get cold feet.
This is a sign that you like the idea of a relationship, but don't want to actually dive into one just yet. This means you're looking for someone to fill a role, not someone to fall for—or maybe you're embarrassed by being single, especially if your ex has already found someone new.
I remember a time when I was insecure about being single and all I wanted was a boyfriend. Not only is this attitude unhealthy, it hardly attracted anyone to me," Mackenzie, a sophomore at the University of Washington, says.
Our society places a lot of emphasis on dating and love, but there's so much more to life than that. It's one thing to compromise on which restaurant you two head to Friday night, but it's another to undergo an Invasion of the Body Snatchers -style transformation on the first date.
This might be a sign that your old relationship left you with some insecurities about who you are or your self-worth—or maybe you were a chameleon with your past partner too.
Either way, it's important that you bring yourself to a relationship, not lose yourself in it. I started to care less and less about things, and forgot about all my goals and career ambitions. I was so obsessed with trying to make him love me, I forgot about myself and the bigger picture.