Depending on your personality you may be more or less likely to benefit from casual sex.
But regardless of where you stand on that continuum, there are certain things you can do to maximize your chances of benefiting from your hookup experiences and minimize your chances of being harmed by them.
Hooking up for the right reasons, such as being attracted to the person sfeeling horny, and wanting a pleasurable, new sexual experience, can improve your overall health and happiness.
Research shows, however, that when you have casual sex for the wrong reasons, your well-being suffers. Getting sexual pleasure out of your hookup is key for your well-being.
If you want a good experience, tell your partners what you want by explicitly asking for it, verbally or non-verbally. Whisper in their ear how you want them to touch you, lead their hand to where you want to be touched, get them in the position that works for you. This is not the time to be shy. Casual hookups are often ambiguous situations and the lines of consent are easily blurred.
Subtle pressure or unwanted yet consensual sex is common in hookups, and this uncertainty is often the main culprit for feelings of regret and distress in the days that follow. Know your limits and express them as clearly, loudly and forcefully as is necessary. In casual sex, a condom is the only thing that keeps you truly safe.
Carry condoms and lube on you at all times. While they may have excellent seduction skills, they are often not particularly good at caring about your pleasure, safety, consent, reputation or well-being.
So if you are someone who likes hooking up with men, do yourself a favor and try to stay away from these kinds of guys. There are plenty of nice, respectful men out there to hook up with. Similar advice may apply when it comes to hooking up with other genders, although statistical evidence is lacking.
Be genuinely passionate, caring, attentive and respectful of your partner at all times. Infatuation with new partners is often an involuntary, neurochemical process. The more you have sex with them, the more your commitment will grow. If this is someone with whom, for whatever reason, you wish to maintain a purely casual relationship, you might have to fight your infatuation with reason and be cognizant of the involuntary nature of the neurochemical process.
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Keep yourself occupied and resist the need to text them 20 times a day, arrange to meet them five days a week, or talk about them and nothing else with all your friends. Many people will reject you for having casual sexespecially if you do it often.
Move to a more liberal social circle if you have to. And if you must be surrounded by people who will judge you if they know that you partake in casual sex, keep your sexual exploits on the down low. A little buzz to get you in the mood is probably OK, but anything beyond that will likely inhibit your ability to evaluate your motives, give and get pleasure or consent, be safe and even to remember the experience.
Maybe the condom broke, your partner ended up being a jerk, the sex was horrible, the wrong people found out, or you ended up drinking too much. So, go easy on yourself. Sex should be fun, right? Unfortunately, there is no one, fool-proof way to ensure casual sex will always be fun, pleasurable, safe, and enriching. That said, Things not to do online hookup 11 rules will help ensure that your hookups are more fun and more fulfilling more often.
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